Paper Pregnancy

So we are paper pregnant!

And still in the first trimester.

Paper pregnancies are funny things – they last longer than nine months, that’s for sure! Our first trimester is lasting forever it seems – we filled out paperwork like crazy, even went and got our fingerprints done for our background checks (local, state, and federal for everywhere we have lived since we were eighteen years old) and had a doctor poke and prod us and declare us medically fit for parenting. Hurrah! We were nearing the end when, SURPRISE, the State of Virginia decided we needed to do more paperwork!

The major part of this paperwork is preparing an emergency plan for our future family, which is to be posted at the child’s eye level and reviewed with them every six months.  Now I don’t doubt that creating an emergency plan is a wonderful idea, but really? What are we, a motel with the evacuation plan posted on the back of the door? Our child will not be able to speak English, much less read it. And we or another competent adult will be there at all times to care for the kid. Of course, we will be teaching our child(ren) that when you see you see smoke or fire… you get out! So yes, it is well meaning but I feel it is more appropriate of a standard for a business rather than a home. However, it is another hoop to jump through, so we will start preparing our “Apocalypse” plan and turn it in to get this show on the road! We will then be able to schedule our home visits (in our lovely new apartment). When they are finished and we get approved, we will be finished with our first trimester! And, praise God and thanks to our wonderful friends, we have all the funds necessary for this section of the adoption!

So what then, you ask?

Once we get approved, we can move forward with being matched to a child – either of our own choosing from a waiting list or chosen by the Bulgarian government. This will be our second trimester and will include the preparation of the dossier and gaining approval from U.S. Immigration to bring an adoptive child into the U.S. Essentially, we have to fill out the same information as for the home study, plus more. We will then have it notarized and appostilled (which is like a super notarizing) and sent over to Bulgaria for translation and review. And then we wait. And wait. And wait to be matched to a child, after which we will be able to travel to see him or her! So while the second trimester may be a very long wait, it is very exciting because we will finally be able to find out details about our child – similar to an ultrasound, we will find out the sex and see a few pictures as well as many other facts about his or her health and parentage if they are available. This is also a very important time for the financial aspect of an adoption – we will have to raise funds like mad, apply to every grant out there available, and throw all our spare change in to make it to the next step. Check out our fundraising progress on the side bar of our blog to see how far we have come!

Our third trimester is the shortest part of the whole paper pregnancy. We will be given travel dates and be off to Bulgaria! All our funds will need to be in at this point, with the last of the expenses being travel costs. We have two required trips – the first one to get to know our child a little before we finalized the adoption and the second to pick up our sweet bundle of joy and complete the last bit of paperwork. The first trip will be a little longer than a week – five total visits to the orphanage where we will have 45 minutes to an hour a day with our child. Then we say “Yes! This is my son/daughter!” and go back to the States while the lawyers do the hard work in the Bulgarian court system.  When we receive the final ruling, about a month after the first trip, we will be given the dates for our second trip (only about four or five days in length) and will bring our little one home! A new Elliott will be “born”!